A LIST OF PROMISING SALES SLOGANS THAT THE TOY MANUFACTERER, MATTEL, COULD POTENTIALLY USE IF THEY EVER DECIDE TO MASS-PRODUCE AND MARKET A “STEM CELL BARBIE.”
“Hey kids, this Barbie might get pregnant!”
“Comes with refrigerated unit to prevent mold.”
“Stem Cell Barbie uses only materials from the 60 cell lines approved by George W. Bush himself.”
“See Barbie scab!”
“Watch her fall in love with Cadaver Ken!”
“Have fun with your religious friends – tell them she’s made from embryos!”
“A quality product: only 1 in 4 will get cancer.”
“Feels like real skin because it is real skin.”