I sat down on the folding chair in front of the emergency room admitting nurse and explained what had happened: “I’ve had an accident in my laboratory.” I was expecting a dramatic reaction. Instead I got barely a raised eyebrow. It must take a lot to surprise an emergency room nurse but still, hadn’t she heard about all the superheroes that have emerged from lab experimentation gone awry (Did she not know about Spiderman, who was bitten by a radioactive spider, or The Incredible Hulk, who was irradiated by gamma rays?) Was she not curious as to what superhuman feats…
The Science Creative Quarterly
From humour
DARWIN: BEWARE OF JUMPING THE SHARK
Happy Birthday Darwin! In case, you weren’t yet aware, you’re currently caught in a year for scientific giddiness. A year where a collective hurrah can be heard from those who make it their business to hypothesize, analyze, and formulize. 2009 is the year of Darwin. It’s a double whammy – his 200th birthday, and also the 150th anniversary of the publishing of the “On the Origin of Species.” Both celebratory events because, if you remember, Darwin is the dude that said we were descended from apes, themselves descended from this and that creature, and so on, and so on –…
CASTING CALL
Are you: an out of work writer, a devoted YouTube commenter, laboring over a screenplay? Are your Instagram captions two paragraphs long? Do you have a mommy blog? A major cable network (Spike TV) is casting talent for Written Off — A reality show, focused on writing, hosted and judged by supermodel Kate Upton and spiritual self-pleasurer and author of more than 30 books (all pretty much on the same topic) Paulo Coelho. Each episode requires writers to showcase their mastery of the English language with challenges such as: penning e-cards (conveying emotions people are too lazy to put into…
IS THERE A SANTA?
– FROM THE ARCHIVES – Being a scientific investigation of a cultural conundrum Soon it will be Christmas Eve, and once more children will be divided into distinct factions. Here, Cyr [1] described younger children (<7 years) who believe in Santa Claus, and older children (>12 years) who have ditched this ‘childish’ belief. But he fails, by excluding from his questionnaire, to describe a third group who aren’t really sure – the undecided voters if you like. And as the eldest child, I have spent a large part of my life in this group. Moreover, being scientifically minded even at…
EPISODE 2: UNDERGRADS
Regardless of what you’re studying, if you’ve ever been a TA (teaching assistant), you can relate to this episode. Trying to balance research with his TAing responsibilities, Dave encounters that one student we all love to hate – that’s right, the keener. Meanwhile, Steven tries a different approach when training undergrads. What are some interesting things students have said/done in class? Share your experience with us on YouTube (www.youtube.com/watchTheLab), Twitter (www.twitter.com/watchTheLab), or Facebook (www.facebook.com/watchTheLab). Cast: Frank R. Bailey IV, Daniela Tempesta, Walt Yao, Jonathan Tan, Jasleen Kaur, Dawn Williamson, Dave Walden, Cara Halseth, Diane Nhan, Tanveer Kahlon, Max Clough, and…
EPISODE 1: WELCOME TO GRAD SCHOOL
It’s the beginning of a new semester. So what does that mean for grad students? Watch episode one of “The Lab” as Dave, a typical PhD student, tries to find a way to balance his research work with his social life. What is it like explaining your research to friends and family? Share your experience with us on YouTube (www.youtube.com/watchTheLab), Twitter (www.twitter.com/watchTheLab), or Facebook (www.facebook.com/watchTheLab). Cast: Frank R. Bailey IV, Daniela Tempesta, Walt Yao, Jonathan Tan, Jasleen Kaur, Dawn Williamson, Dave Walden, Cara Halseth, Diane Nhan, Tanveer Kahlon, Max Clough, and Phil Dundas. Director of Photography: Jared Cheer Written by:…
REASONS WHY IT WOULD BE UNFORTUNATE TO NAME YOUR CHILD “EBOLA”
He/she is always picked last in gym. All the dumb predictable jokes, as in: “Look, Ebola has just entered the room…” The constant requests to wash his/her hands. The confusion when prospective employers google his/her name. Always being asked to dress up in HazMat gear at Halloween. When travelling, airport security tends to freak. The awkwardness in cooking class. Family and friends insist that he/she not blow out his/her own birthday candles. Santa would rather not pose with him/her for pictures. That chaos that ensues whenever he/she asks for a bandaid. Because he/she will be misunderstood, bullied and misinterpreted by…
AND GOD SAID, “LET THERE BE DINOSAURS!”
Let there be light! Let there be Heaven and Earth! Let there be mortal souls created in Mine own image, gifted with reason and free will… in a bit. First, let there be a bunch of giant fucking monsters everywhere! In My infinite wisdom, I know that populating Earth with millions of Godzillas will be awesome. Humongous monsters with silly little arms! Tiny monsters that hunt in packs! Monsters covered in bulletproof plates with spikes for tails and ocean monsters and flying monsters that terrorize the skies and HOLY SHIT THIS WILL BE VERY FUCKING COOL. Using the divine power…
MONSANTO DOES NOT CONDONE CANNIBALISM
Monsanto does not condone cannibalism. We do not endorse the systematic harvesting of mortal flesh for mass consumption. We do not drool at the thought of rendering a bountiful population of citizens into edible chunks of protein. None of us here fantasize about a future in which the farming of our fellow man is a viable practice. I just want to get that out in the open. Take it from me. I am one of thousands of Monsanto employees not brainstorming concepts for packaged foodstuffs made from human body parts. Like my colleagues, I did not sign an NDA which…