FREDDY MIND: To begin with, let me introduce myself. My name is Freddy Mind. It’s a stage name. I was once one-half of the physics duo of Freddy Mind & Yoichiro Nambu. This man to my right, he needs no introduction! Go ahead and introduce yourself, Yoshey.

YOICHIRO NAMBU (softly): My name is Yoichiro Nambu, and I won the Nobel Prize for physics.

MIND (laughs): When you think of good ol’ Yoshey, you don’t necessarily think of me, you know. The hardcore fans know about the early years, the struggles, but it’s not general knowledge. Ain’t that the truth?

NAMBU: Yes.

MIND: See, I knew Yoshey from university and I knew he was smart. Myself, I was flunking just about every goddamn subject, including physics, my major! But I also knew that I had the looks, see? The women, they adored what I had to offer! Yoshey was . . . well . . . Yoshey was always what you would call a little shy. Am I wrong, Yosh?

NAMBU: No.

MIND: So I waltzed up to this jackass one day in the university’s Der Rathskeller and he’s crouching over some big old book, and I broach the idea. We can make it, you and me! A duo, right? I got the looks, you got the ideas, I got the heart, you got the brain. Let’s make a go of this! Am I remembering this right, Yosh?

NAMBU: Yes.

MIND: We began by hitting the college lecture circuit. We’d drive all night in this dilapidated van I bought from a boyfriend of a stripper I knew, right? Guy had one thumb. I say, ain’t that right, Yosh?

NAMBU: Right.

MIND: And there’s no heat in this big ol’ lemon and there’s no back window and there’s a mural of a sunset on the side. And I made this guy drive. What? You blame me? The van’s mine! You didn’t mind driving, did you, Yosh?

NAMBU: No.

MIND: He did, but he’s too nice to say otherwise! So we’d give a lecture, pack up and do it all over again the next night—I should explain. Mr. Nimble would lecture and I would handle the visuals. If we needed a chalkboard, I’d get that. If we needed a large molecular model, I’d find that somehow. You know, the plastic whatcha-ma-thingies with the balls on each end. I was also in charge of the wood pointer. Remembering now, Physics Man?

NAMBU: Yes.

MIND: You say that like it wasn’t important! Without that pointer, you wouldn’t now have your big house, your fancy cars! Ah, whatever. I ain’t angry. So this is when things really start to change for us. Remember that time at the University of Prague and all those women stayed afterwards? And that one in particular? The beautiful brunette with the huge gorzongas and that mole on her cheek in the shape of a banana? And I came in all bleary-eyed the next morning and I told you in great detail what she did to me? You remember that?

NAMBU: Yes.

MIND: How could you forget! I showed you the photos to prove it! Oh, man. Sick, sick days. So, try to picture this: it’s winter and it’s freezing! Me and Yoshey are well on our way to the Eidgenössische Technische Hochschule in Zurich, and The Yosh is leaning out the window wiping the ice off the windshield and it’s snowing and this smart guy looks over at me and says, “No more, I’m out.” I’m like, what? Out of what? Things are just heating up! You and me, we’re going all the way! You with your theories, and me with my wild energy and zany Hawaiian T-shirts! How can we be stopped? We couldn’t! Could we be stopped, Nambo?

NAMBU: No.

MIND: See, Yosh just wanted to concentrate on some new theories in a solo capacity; do his own thing. That’s cool. But by doing that, he alienated our fan base by taking physics in an entirely different direction. Which ain’t so cool. Jump to a few years later, when Professor Science over here arrives at his special theory. I could have been furious, I could have said, “Hey, if it wasn’t for me, you never would have come up with that award-winning theory, there never would have been a Nobel, the fame, the fortune, the photos in all the magazines. None of it would have happened!” I could also have said it was really me who came up with the y part in that equation to begin with … but I didn’t, did I?

NAMBU: No.

MIND: Yeah, the y part. But that’s all in the past. It’s forgotten. He did his thing, I did mine. Ah, what the hell, I have no regrets! Me and Benny, a poker buddy, we now tour the nostalgia circuit as the Original Mind & Nambu. We come out in elaborate dress, the music is blasting, and we give our little talk and then reenact physics equations through song and dance. Nothing too fancy, just some good, clean fun. We sign autographs, hand out Frisbees, a coupla beer cozies, we pose for photos, we’ll do anything! I invited this guy here, but he’s too good now! You too good now, Dr. Nobel?

NAMBU: No.

MIND: Anyway, I’m glad you brought us back together. We were the best scientific team ever . . . even if Mr. Brain now does have a swollen head! Ha! The creases around his eyes are rising, just like they used to whenever he was angry! But if you ever need a physicist for a birthday party or a Sweet Sixteen, please give me a call. Here’s my card. My name is Freddy Mind and the pleasure was all mine! That’s copyrighted, by the way. Hey! Fat Head, you got a light? There we go, there’s a smart guy.

What if my lab coat has a stain on it and I just can’t see it? Will people be able to tell this is the same lab coat I wore yesterday?

Is it going to rain? What if it rains? Do I have an umbrella in the car?

If I leave too late, am I gonna get caught in traffic and be late to work? If I leave too early, am I going to get to the lab and no one will be there and I’ll feel weird and alone for a half hour?

I’ve seen like three TV shows in the last year that featured a water heater bursting while the man of the house was away at work. What if that happens to me? Do I have things I need that can’t get wet too close to the floor?

Has the large-scale restructuring of university science programs in the past 25 years from a model based on non-proprietary science for the ‘public good’ to the ‘academic capitalism’ model based on the ‘knowledge economy’ led to the failure of the science community to oversee the transition of transgenic crop technology from the research stage to commercialization?

Is Janice cheating on me? Why would she just call me when I’m at work for no reason? It’s like she’s trying to keep me from accidentally calling her while she’s up to something.

Does a ham sandwich have too much salt for me? Could all the sodium be what’s causing my hair to fall out? Does that even make sense?

Why would she cheat on me? Is it because of my penis? Does she find my penis unsatisfactory? Or am I just a poor love-maker? Why isn’t there a way to objectively analyze your ability to make love?

Maybe she just feels emotionally abandoned by me. Maybe she feels like the scope of my professional, scientific concerns leaves little room for worrying about her.

What if someone shoots a space laser that accidentally evaporates the atmosphere? There should be a quorum. Someone should make a quorum about that.

What if Chris turns out gay? How will society treat him? I mean, if it’s genetic or it’s taught, he’s my son, right? Would Janice leave me for that? I mean, she seems open-minded, but I know she wants grandchildren. Maybe we should have some more kids.

What kind of person thinks about whether a six-year old is gay or not? What does that say about me?

Oh shit, traffic’s gonna be fucked going home.

Do I have enough gas stuck in traffic like this? Does it take more gas to get home at idling speed or at 60 miles per hour? Aren’t I a scientist? Shouldn’t I know things like this? Am I a bad scientist?

What if one day I’m trying to unlock the door and the key breaks in the lock? What would I do then?

Is Janice being evasive or was she just doing such boring stuff all day that she really thinks I wouldn’t care about it?

Why does Chris keep doing that thing with his pinky every time he grabs his cup?

Without strong action to reduce heat-trapping emissions, could midwestern states face dramatic changes including an increase in the number of extreme heat days, more intense spring rains that delay agricultural planting, and an expansion of crop-damaging pests?

What’s with this erectile dysfunction? Is it because of that ham sandwich I had earlier? Is that what sodium does? I should look into that at work tomorrow.

Assuming there is a tomorrow.

(If you want to leave a comment about the talk, please do so here).

Topic: Alex discusses the influence of gender in his own life in this TEDx talk, describing both medical and social perspectives of gender in our daily lives and the impact and consequences these perspectives bring to every individual.

Links:
Transgender Health Program, VCH, TEDxTt09

Filmed by Craig Ross at TEDx Terry talks 2009 (October 3rd, 2009). Video edited by David Ng.

This inevitably raises the question if water is a “human right”: Should everyone have access to clean water? But how should water supply and consumption be regulated to guarantee both universal access to and sustainable use of this precious resource? Arguably, less water would be wasted if it were priced at market value. Would this scarce resource be better managed if water were treated as a commodity, and traded and priced accordingly?

Canada has been blessed with large freshwater resources and is often termed one of the “water-richest” countries in the world. So, why can’t we just lean back and enjoy nature’s plentiful supply? With increasing water shortage in other regions of the world, water-rich countries are brought into play as possible sources and suppliers of the Blue Gold. This raises the question if we should share our abundant supply with those who are desperately in need of water. It is not so much a question of engineering pipelines but – first and foremost – of putting adequate and sustainable governance and management systems in place to regulate water supply with all environmental foresight necessary.

What makes water so special?

We tend to think of water as something consumed, but water does not actually “get used up” – and understanding the issue of water shortage requires some counterintuitive thinking. The amount of water on our planet does not change – only its distribution. In a continuous cycle, the same water molecules evaporate from the oceans and the land surface into the atmosphere, drop onto the land as precipitation and transfer back to the sea (hydrologic cycle). Groundwater occurs in the tiny spaces between soil particles (silt, sand, and gravel) or in cracks in bedrock. In many cases, groundwater is interconnected with lakes and rivers and often resurfaces as springs. The underground areas of soil or rock where substantial quantities of water are found are called “aquifers” and provide most of the water supply in regions where the surface water is scarce or polluted. Aquifers are important sources of irrigation water and are used extensively for municipal, domestic, and industrial water supplies.

Groundwater resources may, however, become depleted when the rate of recharge does not match the amount of water withdrawn – either a result of overpumping, the extraction of groundwater in excess of supply, or decreasing recharge, e.g. caused by droughts. Due to their inaccessibility, most aquifers cannot be “cleaned up” once they have been subjected to contaminants. Moreover, as aquifers can be buried hundreds of meters below the earth surface, it may require decades or even hundreds of years for them to replenish. Deeper aquifers, in particular, may not recharge because the weight of overlying sediments causes the aquifer to compress as the water is pumped out, i.e. it may not recharge for generations, if at all.

An additional degree of complexity is added by the intimate relation between the water cycle and the climate: The climate of a region largely determines the evaporation, precipitation and ultimately the local water supply. The average annual water flow, its seasonal distribution and its variability can be directly affected by climatic changes resulting in an increase in the frequency of extreme weather events and may further put the availability of fresh water at risk. Water supplies may ultimately become scarcer as a combined effect of extreme weather patterns, an increase of water evaporation and a reduction of stored fresh water resources in glaciers and snowpacks.

The world’s water: human right or commodity?

The World Bank considers access to clean water a “human need” rather than a “human right” [3]. What seems a subtle difference at first glance, actually allows for two fundamentally different interpretations: a human need can be supplied by the market – in other words, water becomes a trade good, a commodity which is subject to principles of profit. Human rights, on the other hand, cannot be traded. Up to this date, however, the right to access to drinking water has not been added explicitly to the Universal Declaration of Human Rights [4]. It is argued that access to water is included in the right to an adequate standard of living [5] leaving substantial room for interpretation.

The issue of water privatization is fairly recent. Historically, private companies showed little interest in owning or managing water utilities as there was little or no profit to be made. Water and sanitation have traditionally been supplied by public utilities. Limited public budgets are, however, increasingly driving governments to foster the privatization of water supplies, mainly centred on two reasons: apart from securing additional revenue by selling water licences to private companies, many governments regard it as means of improving public infrastructure and service delivery without tremendous public investments. Furthermore, multinational corporations such as Suez, Veolia Environment and Monsanto see lucrative business opportunities as freshwater resources become rare [6].

Traditionally, water management was limited to safeguarding public water supply by maintaining infrastructure for water storage and distribution but did not focus on reducing water demand. In many municipalities in developed countries, and in North America in particular, water pricing does not encourage water conservation as it rarely reflects the true cost of water. Hence, pricing water at market value has the potential to prevent overconsumption, as long as financial assistance for low-income households still guarantees universal access to drinking water. In addition, environmental laws should require private corporations bear the environmental costs of their operations.

The World Bank, in particular, actively fosters the privatization of water services in developing countries [7,8]. This raises the question, if market-oriented policies that may hold for market economies in “developed” countries can be transferred to countries with a thin domestic capital market or severe debt problems [9]. For instance, Tanzania [10] and Guinea-Bissau [11] have recently received funding under the condition to promote water privatization in their countries. The profit-orientation of private corporations often results in poor water quality as investments in costly equipment and qualified workers are kept low. Depending on the degree of privatization and monopoly – the company’s power to control the water market – one particular company may receive the exclusive right to control the price. An estimated number of one billion people worldwide lack access to safe, potable, and affordable water [12] and increasing water prices may make this essential resource unaffordable for even more low-income families.

On the flipside, it is important to note that water privatization is not necessarily “bad” per se: Many economists argue that private businesses are more cost-efficient and effective in providing services than the public sector. Even if a particular private corporation failed to provide adequate service, one needs to consider the quality and availability of water and the state of the supply system before this company entered the market. Understandably, private corporations will only consider capital investments in infrastructure to expand water delivery systems to poor urban communities, if they can expect a reasonable profit. Yet the profit motive on its own is not enough to condemn privatization as a bad idea or a particular company as exploitative.

Privatization can take various forms with local governments having different degrees of control over water distribution, the infrastructure investments or water pricing. Public tenders, where local government request bids from private contractors to design, construct, operate, and maintain public facilities are a common form of privatization. It allows for competition while giving the local government opportunity to intervene should the company fail to provide adequate service. Privatization, however, becomes more controversial when pumping plants and distribution systems or even water as resource (in form of aquifers or surface water) are sold or transferred to private corporations, allowing a particular company to dictate the price. In developing countries, privatization makes most sense where governments lack the capacities to provide basic public services to their people. However, privatization promotes exploitation in countries where weak or corrupt governments fail to adequately control and regulate the private sector.

On Guard for Thee?

Canada has 20% of the earth’s freshwater, but only 7% of the world’s renewable freshwater supply – the rest is fossil water, water left over from the ice ages trapped in ice, snow and glaciers [13]. Water for profit, however, may take a number of other forms which bring the worldwide water crisis home to Canada: international free trade agreements such as the North American Free Trade Agreement (NAFTA) and World Trade Organization (WTO) have the potential to create international markets for water – be it in bottles, by shipping or building canals and pipelines. Canadian legislation currently prohibits the bulk removal of water from major watersheds. But how will the federal and provincial governments position themselves in a world where more and more countries are running short of water? It is expected that by the middle of the century, up to 6 billion people may live in countries where water is in short supply [14]. This will ultimately not only impose a tremendous pressure on Canadian water export regulations, but also holds the promise of big profits. Given that the removal of large quantities of water will most likely have irreversible effects on the ecosystem, it is of utmost importance not to place short-term profit over environmental sustainability. On top of that, an international water market would be beneficial to only those places in the world that can afford the high water prices rather than to those who are in most urgent need of water.

Nonetheless, it would be fatal to ignore other countries’ demands for water while most parts of Canada seem to be blessed with freshwater resources. It is rather time to conserve our own resources, for example by installing more water meters to move away from flat-rate contracts. Pricing water according to consumption rate has proven to promote water conservation. In order to minimize international tension, sustainable water management calls for the implementation of local alternative water supplies, be it the efficient use of rain water, water desalination plants or water recovery systems. In regions that heavily rely on irrigation, developing alternative agricultural crops and techniques may be part of a solution toward sustainable water use and management. Concerted international efforts are necessary to conserve this precious resource but also provide access to clean water for all – so that water does not become a new source of conflict.

References

[1] United Nations Expert Meeting On World Population in 2300, New York, December 2003.
Accessed November 17, 2008 (link).

[2] World Population Prospects: The 2006 Revision Population Database, United Nations.
Accessed November 17, 2008 (link)

[3] Comprehensive Assessment of the Freshwater Resources of the World, Preparation coordinated by Stockholm Environment Institute (SEI), 1997. Accessed November 17, 2008 (link)

[4] Universal Declaration of Human Rights, UN Office of the High Commissioner for Human Rights. Accessed November 17, 2008 (link)

[5] General Comment 15: The Right to Water (Articles 11 and 12), UN Office of the High Commissioner for Human Right – Committee on Economic, Social and Cultural Rights, 2002. Accessed November 17, 2008 (link)

[6] V. Shiva, Water Wars: Privatization, Pollution and Profit, South End Press, p.88, 2002.

[7] Policy Paper, World Bank – Water Resource Management, p.15, 1993. Accessed November 17, 2008 (link)

[8] Ibid. p.42.

[9] J. Vickers, G. Yarrow., Economic Perspectives on Privatization, Journal of Economic Perspectives, vol. 5, no 2., p.111, 1991.

[10] Press Release No:2003/384/AFR: Tanzania Receives US$250 Million To Support Government’s Efforts To Reduce Poverty, World Bank, 2003. Accessed November 17, 2008 (link)

[11] Press Release No:2006/468/AFR: World Bank Supports a Program to Rehabilitate National Infrastructure, World Bank, 2006. Accessed November 17, 2008 (link)

[12] V. Thorne, W. Thomas, Issues of Water Scarcity and Multinational Corporations, 18 Nat. Resources & Env’t, 13, 2003.

[13] A Primer on Fresh Water, Environment Canada, 2006. Accessed November 17, 2008 (link)

[14] The United Nations World Water Development Report – Executive Summary, 2003. Accessed November 17, 2008 (link)

The rating stands. (Spoiler alert: We rounded.) Actually, we took our cue here from Leonard Euler. Our rating is actually “e,” as in the sound of the squeals that will inevitably emanate from the ladies of Cambridge after they all get a hold of Inverse come two months. Yes, M.I.T.’s finest are back with a shtick to shake up the innumerate masses for whom any further mention of the band’s album sales sends us critics to sleep, and more than a few of the recent graduates of that other school up the river into jealous fits.

The locals’ reaction is only natural, a function of their irrational excitement at seeing a few local kids done good: The three engineering majors, who first met when they lived near one another in Random Hall, used to play pick-up games in Killian Court, and now they’re playing Paradise and The Middle East. On Inverse, the band’s characteristic technical precision is back–mens et manus (mind and hand), indeed! Their rhythms can get tricky, though, as can some of the band members’s in-jokes: “Hack,” the lead single, may or may not refer to their campus’s slang for prank. Had the band intended for Inverse to be a one-off, though, then the joke’s on us: The album art, an eager beaver (”nature’s engineer”), suggests that they’re getting just as much of a kick out of playing with us as we get out of listening to their tracks.

Is this math rock? Does it matter? We’ve heard the damn thing called everything from Back Bay bhangra (”Ramanujan,” ostensibly a paean to the mathematician) to orchestral pop (”Kendall Square”). We’ll cede the point this time: Who else but these kids could work a reference to Andrew Wiles’ paper on Fermat’s Last Theorem into a freestyle meditation on feminine wiles (”I Need Proof”)? What does Back Bay bhangra even mean? (Bhangra originated in the Punjab; Ramanujan was Tamil.) Nothing? Oh, that may be our bad: The review where we read that might have said South Boston bodhran, as in the Irish hand drum, but whatever. The bonus track is a live cover of “Love Minus Zero (No Limit),” obvs.

You know, we don’t even know anymore. Say that Inverse is derivative, and you’re labeled a hater. Admit that it will soon be integral to your seasonal soundtrack, and all of the sudden you’re an apologist. All we’re asking for is a return to an equilibrium, because at its best, Inverse is transcendent. (Like a function. That’s the idea. Haters gonna hate.) Who gives two shits about using Ohm’s Law after high school physics? These kids do, and it shows on Inverse. The band’s created a formula for success, and we can’t fault them for that. Love minus zero? Well, it’s all love here!

We’re not sure we have ever heard a single one of their songs.

(If you want to leave a comment about the talk, please do so here).

Topic: Dr. Jennifer Gardy, an alumnus speaker at the event, is co-leading the new genome research lab at the BC Centre for Disease Control (BCCDC). She is also known as Nerd Girl from her Globe and Mail blog of the same name. In her talk, Gardy shared how advances in technology have provided increased collaboration on scientific research and scholarly publications — what she labelled as public health 2.0.

For example, she showed how one publication had 36 authors. After leading the audience through the origins of H1N1, she stated how it only took five days from the sequencing of the virus to the first open-source paper. Gardy ended her talk emphasizing how students should be willing to explore the benefits of Open Access publications, collaborative research, and emerging technologies. (From Phillip Jeffrey’s Macleans’ oncampus blog)

Links:
BCCDC, Nerd Girl, Phillip Jeffrey, TEDxTt09

Filmed by Craig Ross at TEDx Terry talks 2009 (October 3rd, 2009). Video edited by David Ng.

Presented on March 10th, 2009 at the Second Annual Most Exceptional Escapades in Science (This Time Also Darwinian) High School Student Conference, Michael Smith Laboratories, University of British Columbia.

grand white polar bears
so sad their numbers dwindle
seals would not agree

We have all heard of the electric eel, but recently a fossil was obtained from the mid-Atlantic shelf which indicates that this was not the only eel which could generate its own power. When bones were brought up from the depths, it was discovered that this creature, though sharing all the usual eel characteristics, also had a strange hollow bony structure in its back, with what appeared to be an opening in which it could fill with liquid.

Scientists were at first stumped until Dr. Ivan Offelkov of Stump University realized that this eel was in a region of the ocean far from where eels were normally found. “An eel would need a different source of energy to swim so far away from home,” noted the Professor. Others took up the matter, realizing that the bony structure could indeed have been a fuel tank of sorts. Other structures seemed to indicate further facets of a non-standard locomotion: tendons connecting in odd places, and a baffling system of calcified ganglions.

Dr. Offelkov theorizes that this poor animal died off due to shorts in its complicated circuitry. Some of his colleagues disagree, however. Professor C.D. Hicks from the Backwater Fish School of Ozark College, thinks that the structures for holding its electrical charges wore out too soon, and that the hybrid eel wasn’t popular enough to warrant its continuance as a viable species. Dr. Heinz Varietese of the Pittsburgh Oceanographic Society points out that in this eel’s epoch (early Mesozoic) that fossils were scarce, and fuels made from them likely in short supply.

The Equus Gigantis, or giant horse, was for many years considered only to be a stylized cave painting of some other animal, such as a hippopotamus, until the late 1950’s when the bones of several were actually discovered. This horse differed from the modern horse in ways other than just size. Like the cave drawings, it appeared to have a rather aggressive stance, its forepaws being somewhat shorter than its hindquarters. This gave it the look of having been artificially lowered. In addition, it had very large feet in the back, presumably giving it greater acceleration for escaping its enemies. These were quite obviously very powerful animals, generating far more than the standard one horsepower of the modern horse, and with that power probably came speed, even though that speed would have been useless on the winding paths around the tightly-knit cave communities where these fossils have been found.

Early cave renderings usually depict a male riding one as numerous large-breasted females gaze on him in admiration. It also appears that Equus Gigantis was oft times decorated with what in modern times might be called “bling:” flaming torches in the back, large funnels directing air to the nose so that the animal might breathe better, and flashy gold pinwheels decorating its knees. Many times , according to the pictures, a huge bass drum was also strapped to the horse, which must have produced earth-shaking thuds.

Some scientists at first believed that all this extra weight was the cause of this animal’s extinction, but analysis of the skeletal structure shows that this creature could easily accelerate to high speeds even with the extra loads. It is therefore now thought that Equus Gigantis perished because it ate too much, drank too much, and left too much waste material polluting the settlements of early man. Its cave dwelling masters simply ran out of resources to feed its huge appetite, and were forced to find other means of proclaiming their manhood and attracting females.

This bird was first discovered in the early twentieth century, and was at first thought to be a mere homing pigeon with a broken beak. No real investigation was made into its inner structures.

After some seventy five years, however, biologist Hooper T. Hoppet did a more extensive examination, discovering, among other things, that not only did all the extant examples of this pigeon have broken beaks, but that they also had a structure within the cranium resembling a voice box, and a long bone of high metallic content extending from it. Hoppet subjected these structures to various electronic tests, determining, in fact, that the copper-rich bone would function for picking up radio waves, and the “voice box” could, when stimulated to different shapes electronically, produce sounds. He immediately realized that this was a far more sophisticated homing device than that of the standard Homing Pigeon. Apparently this bird was capable of receiving directions for getting home via satellite signals. The broken beaks indicated to Hoppet that, unfortunately, these birds were so intent on listening for directions that they failed to notice other obstacles in front of them. With so much other air traffic, as well as trees, mountains, and tall dinosaurs, these birds soon collided with extinction. Pigeons evolved to newer, simpler forms which could actually just remember where home happened to be.

Recently, the discovery was made in Australia of a rather peculiar extinct kangaroo. It was very large, and had extra pouches. While one might think that these were to hold extra offspring, all but one contained what resembled crude cups. Apparently this kangaroo, like all other ’roos, did carry it’s young about, but needed extra space just in case, and apparently, while carrying its sole “joey” from activity to activity, liked to feel secure (hence, the extra size) and also felt the need for vast quantities of coffee, the residue of which was discovered in the cups. One theory has it that coffee is not good for a kangaroo. Though there has been no definitive research done here, it seems a plausible explanation for this creature’s demise. Dr. Oz Wallaby, though, feels that perhaps in hopping from place to place taking the child to learn various kangaroo kicking games, the coffee simply splashed on the youngster, and all potential descendants were scalded to death.