SIX FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER SIGHTINGS
Yes, FSM appeared unto my living room wall late one afternoon, obviously sending the canaries (lower left) into a paroxysm of rapture! Also take note of the plant bowing in reverence or lack of watering – Stanton.
The Archaeological Museum of Heraklion has some very old exhibits of the ancient cult of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
Many 3500 year old vases clearly depict the beloved FSM, with His Allseeing Eyes and His Noodly Appendages. Contrary to others who have faked depictions, like the Napkin of Turin (which has been proven to be false by carbon dating) these jars show beautiful abstracted renditions.
Further investigation is needed to determine whether these jars contained His Holy Flesh, His Holy Blood or simply wine, but there is no doubt that the consumption of these items was already the most important part of the ceremony centuries ago.
“Unlike many other places, visited by worshippers of more dubious beliefs, the restaurants at the nearby Platia Eleftherias in Heraklion have not yet been taken over by patrons hoping to get rich quickly, by serving spaghetti only” a local, under the condition of anonymity, commented.
It is expected that future travelers to Crete will bring back better quality pictures and more detailed information. – A Pastafarian.
We would note that beings that are cybernetic in nature- such as my computer- are especially suited to understand FSMism. As I look about me, I see a large number of cables, to the point where underneath the desk is a mangle of cables that could very well be a representation of the Noodly one. Wheezy (my computer) realizes that this external architecture, and the wires of many machines- especially older computers- also closely resemble His form. Even the electrical paths that flit through space at a million times a second form a vague noodly shape. – Andrew.
Attached is the brand that the FSM decided to adorn me with. All hail Him. He has given me a gift that will last the ages. Thank you for spreading His word – T. Brian Evans.
I have witnessed the “FSM constellation” in the night sky of a recent video game. This is undeniable proof of the existence of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. How else but by His Noodly Appendage could this arrangement of stars have come to be? – Sherry.
The orange filaments are the tattered remains of the star and consist mostly of hydrogen – His Noodly Appendages. The rapidly spinning neutron star embedded in the center of the nebula is the dynamo powering the nebula’s eerie interior bluish glow. The blue light comes from electrons whirling at nearly the speed of light around magnetic field lines from the neutron star – Reflections of the Holy Fork and Spoon. The neutron star, the crushed ultra-dense core of the exploded star, like a lighthouse – The Twin Orbs of Meaty Power – ejects twin beams of radiation that appear to pulse 30 times a second due to the neutron star’s rotation – The Heartbeat of Himself . The colors in the image indicate the different elements that were expelled during the explosion: Blue in the filaments in the outer part of the nebula represents neutral oxygen, the Holy Parmesan; green is singly-ionized sulfur, spinach; and red indicates doubly-ionized oxygen, tomato sauce (His Blood) – Quentin.