Drawing ludicrous cartoons to memorize scores of gory scientific details has always been an incredible pastime for me. After all, why study off of stacks of flashcards with miniscule writing on them when you can study off pictures instead, as well as have a jolly time envisioning the crazy things you drew while writing the stressful final? And for those who firmly believe that they have no artistic ability whatsoever, rest assured that doodling, especially extremely random and ghastly-looking things, is a no sweat activity! That’s because you don’t have to be an artist to do this! You own your…
The Science Creative Quarterly
From archive
QUANTUM GASTRONOMY
We can safely proclaim that, in the twenty-first century kitchen, ”molecular gastronomy” is passé. Ever since Barbara Lynch unveiled a neutrino-infused chocolate ganache earlier this year, the trend in fine dining has been decidedly subatomic. While we owe a great debt of gratitude to the flour-dusted shoulders upon which we have stood, it behooves us as men and women of food science to not rest on our laurels, however succulent they may be, especially when zested over a summer beet salad. It is with that spirit in mind that we present a brief survey of the latest findings in the…
SLICK CITY: THE PITCH
Alright everyone, you know it’s high time for some major spin control. We may have managed to plug that baby up, but now we’ve got to fight that public relations fight. Ha ha – who would have thought that 4.9 million barrels of crude oil spilling out would piss so many people off? But seriously, the bad press is still everywhere, and we are, quite frankly, getting hammered out there. So what can we do about this? How exactly can we turn this PR nightmare into a PR fairytale? Well, we in the spin department think that we’ve got an…
EPISODE 5.5: A JEDI WINTER SESSION
(Wherein the Empire of State Government attacks the Academic Alliance) Characters: Darth Governor (feel free to replace “Governor” with the name of your state’s Governor) Senator Professor Leia Dean Luke Chancellor Yoda The Emperor Queen Amadala – – – Darth Governor and a Senator enter (Darth Vader music). Darth Governor: The Academic Alliance has thwarted you again Senator. They have misled you with all their talk of how the Empire is crippling the university. Senator: But Lord Governor, they say that by crippling the university we are hurting the Empire. Darth Governor: Of course they say that, but you are…
SCIENCE’S BEST JOKESTERS
“The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds the most discoveries, is not ‘Eureka! but ‘That’s funny!’” -Isaac Asimov – – – Science’s best prank call In 1875 after years laboring to create the first working telephone, Alexander Graham Bell successfully called Thomas Watson. Watson picked up the receiver and heard Bell ask, “Watson, is your icebox running?” Watson looked at the phone perplexed and then muttered, “Let me check.” Bell hung up and fell onto his bunkbed in a giggle fit. The pre-teen girls at his slumber party were impressed with Bell’s ability to disguise…
BOILING LOBSTERS AND OTHER THINGS PEOPLE DO
Is it OK to boil a lobster? Short answer: Yes, of course it is. Long answer: Let’s consider the life, or rather the death, of a lobster. In nature lobsters begin very small and die a million horrible deaths in a million horrible ways. As they get older the death rate drops. We have ample evidence that lobsters do not go gentle into that good night, dying peacefully in their sleep at a ripe old age. Instead, once mature, a lobster that doesn’t go into the pot might face off with cod, flounder, an eel or two, or one of…
UP OR DOWN? AN EFFICIENCY-BASED ARGUMENT FOR OPTIMAL TOILET SEAT PLACEMENT
– – – UP OR DOWN? As long as males and females have been living with indoor plumbing they have argued over the placement of the toilet seat. Most often, males leave the toilet seat up and females leave the toilet seat down. Males may not necessarily have a problem with the toilet seat down, but then females will suffer from wet bottom syndrome from time to time. If males leave the seat up, females may “fall” into the toilet particularly at night. A solution to this problem is to always leave the toilet seat in a particular position: the…
WHAT NAGOYA COP10 ISN’T
A particularly tricky wrestling move. The long anticipated installment of a popular Japanese police TV serial. An unfortunate typo for an especially niched Japanese pop music chart. An ointment used to treat especially aggressive forms of Nagoya. The first line of a haiku that was awarded the distinction of being “most boring.” Next year’s popular International CATS ON PROZAC seminar. A droid that is seen for only 2 seconds during the Return of the Jedi. Worst ever celebrity child name. * * * (Curious folks can read this if they’d like to find out more. Folks on twitter may add…
IN MEDIA RES: NEWS AND THE PUBLIC (MIS)UNDERSTANDING OF SCIENCE
“The best lack all conviction, while the worst ere full of passionate intensity.” The Second Coming, William Butler Yeats – – – “Scientists identify gene that influences quality of person’s empathy”… “Earth ‘heading for 6ºC’ of warming”… “From the lab, a New Weapon Against Cholesterol”. These three headlines were taken from three leading and reputable media outlets: the Times of London, the BBC and the New York Times. Apart from their provenance, these headlines share another, arguably less desirable, trait. All massively simplify the scientific primary sources they are reporting. But why would such erudite news sources feel the need…