By Paul Scheet

Paul Scheet, Ph.D., is a statistical geneticist in Houston, Texas. He writes his own grants, as well, although they are sometimes deemed “low energy” by reviewers. His research interests span complex disease genetics and cancer genomics.

DONALD TRUMP WRITES A SCIENCE GRANT

Principal Investigator: Trump, Donald. Title: The Best Biology Aims: Do a lot of things and see what happens. Background and Significance: I did very well in school. I learned a lot of things. Innovation: We will do a lot of things that have never been done before, and then we will do them again. Research Strategy: We will do genetics of really important plants and animals – not minerals, we won’t do minerals. We will produce a lot of data, a lot. Big data. Ten thousand more than everyone else. Summary: Trust me, we will do it. It will be…