A REVIEW OF “MOLECULAR REGULATION OF 23A2 SKELETAL MYOBLAST DIFFERENTIATION AND APOPTOSIS” BY DR. MARGOT FREER

(In the interest of full disclosure, it is worth saying that Justin has known the author for several years. Further, the author has often provided Justin with home cooked meals and emotional support following his frequent, painful breakups and other various frequent personal tragedies. Finally, it is the present reviewer’s opinion that as he received an “A” in biology his superior scientific mind will not be influenced by his relationship with the author.)

This is the greatest book ever.

Now, I should say that I’m not a real big reader of scientific literature, but I could not put this thing down. If this book were widely distributed, I sincerely believe that it would end illiteracy, because it literally pulls you in. If you are in the same room as a copy of this book, I believe you can not escape staring spending hours looking at this book.

When Margot, that’s to say Dr. Freer, said she was wrapping up her magnum opus, I thought “O.K. good for her.” Little did I know that her aptitude for scientific writing would nearly equal, if not equal, the genius of her home made potato French Fries.

(Reports that this book has the power to heal are to scattered and too recent for this reviewer to make judgments. But, as this might show my bias, I wouldn’t be surprised one bit, if the thing had the power to heal.)

Some readers might feel that I am veering towards the dangerously unscientific abyss of subjectivity. Allow me to focus more exactly on the text itself.

I think it is worth noting that the cover is a very sharp red. Some critics may point out that I am color blind. That is true, but I’ve never had trouble with reds. These same critics may point out that I have a very weak sense of smell. But this just goes to show that such critics will stop at nothing to diminish my reputation. I hope such senseless attacks on me, will in no way damage the reputation of Dr. Freer or her culinary delights, which I publicly insist are amazing.

Also, Dr. Freer does indeed display an extraordinarily dry humor to lighten the mood as she talks about the skeletal blasto thingies. So subtle is she, that upon reading through her little piece for the first time, I didn’t find myself laughing at all. My second time, I couldn’t wipe the goofy grin off my face.

No review would be complete without some friendly criticism. I trust that Dr. Freer, will take this as being in the interest of scientific advancement, and not a direct attack on her person or her home cooked meals.

First, with all of the recent debates about Intelligent Design and the other thing, it seems rather striking to this reader, that she makes no attempt to clarify her position. Furthermore, it has come to my attention that Global Warming, is getting sort of out of control. Yet, she makes no mention of it, anywhere. What is she afraid of? Could it be that “Molecular Regulation of 23A2” has been bought and sold by powerful oil companies that are contributing to Global Warming? Is she afraid of what it will do to her reputation should it becomes known that she is on the bankroll of corporations who make it their primary objective to mercilessly beat baby seals—all in the name of a profit?

I hate to say it, but I can’t think of any way around it.

Criticisms aside, there is no better book to pick up this year, and I look forward to celebrating her success over a bottle of one of her finest bottles of wine. My car just broke down and work isn’t going well, so I could really use the support.