“In the first few days, she squealed for cigarettes every now and then, but as her life became more colorful, she gradually forgot about them altogether.”
A zookeeper on Ai Ai, a chimp at a zoo in China that has finally quit smoking after 16 years. (Ananova.com)

“We make kids wear helmets and knee pads,” Dr. Goldstein said. “But no one thinks about protecting the crotch.” a Boston urologist, Dr. Irwin Goldstein on new studies showing the link between bicycle saddles and impotence. (NY Times)

”We call him our ‘missionary lizard,’ “ Looy said. ”When people realize the T. rex lived in Eden, it will lead us to a discussion of the Gospel.”
Mark Looy, vice president at the Creation Museum, the nation’s largest museum devoted to biblical creation science set to open in 2007 in Cincinnati on the Tyrannosaurus Rex. (Boston Globe)

“It is important at what time in the process of copulation you get eaten.”
Trine Bilde, of Aarhus University, the first author of a study by Danish scientists, on the male nursery spider, which presents females with gifts of dead insects, then feigns death and, as she begins eating the gift, then begin copulating beneath her. (News Telegraph UK)

“Let’s hope it had nothing to do with the explosive nature of our work.”
Victor Benno Meyer-Rochow of the International University Bremen, on a study called Pressures Produced When Penguins Pooh – Calculations on Avian Defecation that was honored with an Ignoble Award in Fluid Dynamics. (BBC World News)

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Cosmic expansion is not to blame for expanding waistlines

Professor has students carry garbage around for a week

Thinking beer mat invented

Python bursts after trying to eat gator (need to register)