HOT SCIENCE-Y GUY OF THE MONTH – JAY INGRAM
Check this out! Canada’s own Jay Ingram’s got the posing-with-the-hand-thing going on!
Now, it’s not so rakish a pose as naughty Nikola Tesla (see last Hot Science-y Guy installment), but it’s there, oh yes! So, you know what that means?
Jay Ingram is hot, too.
Well he is. Seriously. Okay, so maybe not so much in the accompanying photo (which, I confess, I shamelessly snatched from here where [you will surely notice] Jay Ingram is the only science-y guy on the page with his hand in his headshot). So I encourage you to run along and Google™ another photo – a recent one – and you’ll see what I mean. Okay, so he’s not the jogging-on-the-beach-in-slow-motion kind of hot, but he’s just so darn likeable. Here is one guy who should run for public office. I mean, who doesn’t like Jay Ingram?
So while I am steadfastly un-curious to witness Jay Ingram doing ads for Calvin Klein boxer briefs (not like with Sparky, the In a Fix electrician – and that was only because I actually saw a picture of Sparky, the In a Fix electrician in his underwear, and no, I do not want to argue about what’s real and what’s computer-enhanced because, really, that’s so completely irrelevant to me because I love the In a Fix electrician for his mind anyway), I think Jay Ingram would be fun to have over for some beers and a movie. You’d let him pick the movie, and he’d pick a really good one, like…I don’t know, but it would be good. Witty, but not cutely clever. Maybe some early Woody Allen. Maybe even an edgy documentary. Maybe you’d grill a couple of steaks on the barbecue. Jay Ingram would tell you about eighteen amazing science news stories while he barbecued the steaks, and when he was finished, they would be perfectly cooked because he truly understands the molecular intricacies of heat and protein. You’d make baked potatoes and a salad. Maybe some asparagus. Dessert would be something light, maybe just some cheese, a buttery Cambozola, perhaps? Conversation would be effortless and spiced with Jay Ingram’s own brand of wry humour. And then Jay Ingram would help you clean up afterward and then apologize that he really has to leave early because he’d have to go home and work on some endlessly fascinating piece of science writing. You’d do a small load of laundry. And you’d know that Jay Ingram would call you the next day to say thanks for a really nice evening and thanks for the loan of your Andrea Barrett book before you’d even had a chance to read it yourself.
And as you folded your small load of laundry later that night, you’d think “Gee, that Jay Ingram is such a nice man! Too bad I just can’t help but fall for the bad boys…” And you’d pour yourself a tawny port and finish up the Cambozola and gaze out the window and picture yourself lounging around some hotel pool in Vegas with Sparky, the In a Fix electrician.
And as quickly as it had begun, it would be over. But Jay Ingram would be extra cool about things, because not only is Jay Ingram a nice Hot Science-y Guy, he’s a spooky smart Hot Science-y Guy, and so Jay Ingram would understand. You don’t believe me? Check out that photo once again, folks. See those eyes probing deep into the dark recesses of your soul?
Jay Ingram understands everything.