REASONS WHY IT WOULD BE UNFORTUNATE TO NAME YOUR CHILD “EBOLA”

He/she is always picked last in gym.

All the dumb predictable jokes, as in: “Look, Ebola has just entered the room…”

The constant requests to wash his/her hands.

The confusion when prospective employers google his/her name.

Always being asked to dress up in HazMat gear at Halloween.

When travelling, airport security tends to freak.

The awkwardness in cooking class.

Family and friends insist that he/she not blow out his/her own birthday candles.

Santa would rather not pose with him/her for pictures.

That chaos that ensues whenever he/she asks for a bandaid.

Because he/she will be misunderstood, bullied and misinterpreted by the hordes of proclaimed “experts” on social media*.