THINGS TO AVOID AT ALL COST WHEN SPEAKING PUBLICLY
Vomiting.
Aggressive sweating.
Evil powerpoint slides.
B.S.
Spitting.
Mumbling.
Multiple shots of that animal or flower you saw during your vacation, that yes, while interesting, does not need more than one slide in your talk.
Non-mocking, gratuitous product placements.
Fake accents.
Wardrobe malfunctions.
Being under the influence.
Slides depicting graphic surgical techniques (unless of course, your talk is about the said graphic surgical technique).
Being creepy.
Unnecessary math.
Intense body odor.
The font: Comic Sans.
Being dull.
Laughing nervously.
Laughing maniacally.
Wearing sunglasses for no apparent reason.
Not making eye contact.
Inappropriate bleeding.
Your phone ringing.
Significant use/exploration of body orifices.
Poor colour choice on slides.
Losing consciousness.
Sub optimal body fluid control.
Being too long.
Losing your dentures.
Excessive slide animations.
Revealing, distracting attire.
Apparent and/or perceived randomness.
Erections.
Spelling errors.
Overt, uncalled for arrogance.
Laser pointer abuse.
Embarrassing computer desktops (during setup or slideshow problem).
Not having a backup.
Packing heat.
Winging it.
Being an idiot.
Thanks to PhysioProf, Karen, Chris, Jenjen, Stephen, Janet, Fiona, fizzchick, Tara, GrrlScientist, 6EQUJ5, Eva, Timon, RPM, John, Mark, Cherish, bsci, tguy, HP, tk, le.gail.savant, Feynmaniac, Matthew, Mike, Lab Rat, George, Eric, cowgirl, Mike, Eric, Samia, and Lisa. To suggest more, please go here and leave a comment.