– FROM THE ARCHIVE – The recent popularity of math and science based plays and movies, such as “Proof”, “A Beautiful Mind”, and “Copenhagen”, has catalyzed the recovery of lost plays from famous mathematicians and scientists themselves. Below is the complete text of “To Teach the Calculus,” which was recently “recovered” from the notebooks of Max Planck. After winning his Nobel Prize in 1918 for work in radiation physics, Planck explored a variety of other fields. This is his only known foray into the theater. Planck had a reputation as a difficult and demanding teacher among the students at the…
The Science Creative Quarterly
By vincelicata
Vince LiCata is a biochemist in the Department of Biological Sciences at the Louisiana State University. His laboratory studies protein structure and function. He owns two Britney Spears CDs, but one of them is an illegal copy given to him by one of his students. He routinely gives out more than 25% A’s in his General Biochemistry and Biophysical Chemistry courses, yet is considered a hard-ass. He is reasonably sure that if Britney Spears got in a fight with Jessica Simpson, that BS would crack JS like a little twig.
DR SCIENCE AND ME
As a real scientist, I have hated the “Ask Dr. Science” humorous newspaper column ever since I was a small child. I mean, this man, this “Dr. Science,” who writes the column is obviously deranged: a compulsive liar who seems to know almost nothing about science. In contrast, I was almost a child genius who graduated from Harvard with a Ph.D. in theoretical physics at age 17 (note to editor: please be careful not to delete the word “almost”). But, did anyone give me a nationally syndicated column called “Ask Dr. Science”? Need I answer that question? The “Ask Dr.…
A MISPLACED CHAPTER FROM THE BOOK OF GENESIS
(Last week was reading week at UBC, but we were so freaking busy that we didn’t even get a chance to rest. Therefore, this week we get to catch up on our sleep by reprinting some of our finest. Enjoy.) – FROM THE ARCHIVE – And lo, it came to be that God was sitting around in his Lazy-God recliner one quiet millennium, and He sayeth unto His Godlike self: “God is bored and needs some entertainment.” And lo, God created the Earth and all it’s inhabitants without getting up from the Lazy-God chair, even whence God needed the occasional…
MY NEW GRADUATE COURSE OFFERING
Title: Introduction to My Research Area Course Instructor: Me T Th 10:30 -12:00, Willams 205 Office Hours: by appointment Course Syllabus: The course will consist of me, talking about my research area, for 15 weeks. Topics to be covered include: 1. My research area. 2. Why my research area is important. 3. Important contributions I have made to my research area. 4. Contributions other researchers have made to my research area, including an objective appraisal of any problems or errors in these studies. 5. Future work in my research area. 6. Other stuff about my research area. – – –…
A BIO-CHRISTMAS CAROL
– FROM THE ARCHIVES – Characters: Dr. Scrooge Young Scrooge Teen Scrooge Scrooge’s mother Dr. Jacob Marley Graduate Student Bob Cratchett Bob Cratchett’s wife Tiny Tina The Spirit of Christmas Past, a Developmental Biologist The Spirit of Christmas Present, a Biochemist The Spirit of Christmas Future, an Evolutionary Biologist Faculty member #1 Faculty member #2 A boy (14 characters if singly cast. Several parts could be double cast. Scrooge can be either male or female. The Spirits and Faculty Members can also be either gender). – – – – – Scene 1. “Scrooge’s Office” Scrooge and Cratchett are sitting working…
IT’S A WONDERFUL LAB
A 15 minute play, in 7 scenes. Characters Dr. Georgina Bailey Clarence (an angel) Jethro (a graduate student) ZuZu (another graduate student) Faculty member #1 Faculty member #2 Chairman of the Department Willie the bartender Car driver Angel #1/Child #1 Angel #2/Child #2 The set consists of four main areas: The lab: a small table, upstage, center The faculty meeting room: A set of chairs downstage right. The bar: stage left The street in front of the bar: center stage. SCENE 1: WHEREIN GEORGINA BEMOANS THE SITUATION IN HER LAB. GEORGINA: (enters her lab, there is no one there) Hello?…
ONCE UPON A TIME IN THE LAB: THE “REVIVARIN” STORY, WITH FIGURES
(See here first) Click here for larger view of image Once upon a time, I was working in lab late into the night. Late I say. So late that I was having trouble focusing both eyes in the same focal plane at the same time. Of course it also could have been from staring into the fluorescence microscope for 26 hours strait, and getting ready for the big conference that was coming up. The new drug I was studying, Revivarin, was not working consistently, and I was beginning to think that my presentation at the upcoming meeting would be a…
IN THE MATTER OF DR. K: A POEM CREATED SOLELY FROM PHRASES IN AN ATTORNEY’S LETTER OF APPLICATION FOR A US GREEN CARD FOR ONE OF MY FORMER STUDENTS, IN THE SAME ORDER AS THEY APPEAR IN THE LETTER.
She is a research scientist of extraordinary ability, Her abilities are extraordinary and place her at an elite level of practice. She has managed to master numerous highly complex procedures that many in her field do not. She has distinguished herself from her peers by possessing great expertise in an almost unprecedented number of specialty areas. She is one of the country’s foremost molecular biologists, The greatest factor distinguishing Dr. K in the field: Her ability to incomparably characterize and integrate, Her unique level of expertise; An integral knowledge, Crucial features. In a remarkable study, She played a leading role…
FREQUENTER LIST 2006: VINCE LiCATA
– PART I: A HAIKU – I don’t like haiku. Never have and never will. So I won’t write one. – PART II: TEN LINKS 1) www.opiummagazine.com (Humor-lit site, where I’ve published several pieces). 2) www.yankeepotroast.org (Who doesn’t love a good potroast? Great humor site). 3) spillwayreview.com (a beautiful online literary mag from New Orleans, where I’ve also published). 4) www.pindeldyboz.com (if you don’t know pindeldyboz yet, then you don’t know squat about online literary magazines). 5) www.apeculture.com/movies/swscience.htm (a set of articles on “The Science of Star Wars” that is absolutely a hoot!). 6) www.toromagazine.ca/home.html (Proving that male Canadians can…